Go Ahead…Intimidate Yourself; Opportunities


Happy Friday friends! I’ve been running around like a crazy woman the past few days. I think I told y’all that I am moving for the third time since moving down to Florida a little over 6 months ago. I am not tied to a place and that is a pretty cool feeling. However, some stability would be nice.

I am in a transformative phase right now where I have so many options and possibilities in front of me and I can choose how I approach each of them. For once I feel like instead of becoming intimidated or discouraged, I have momentum. I feel like I have value and I am seeing everything as learning experience to get me better at what I ultimately want to end up doing in life, which is combination of working in the Float Industry and the Fitness/wellness industry but at much higher level than I am now. I am doing everything that I can  I am sitting down and being humble while learning from every experience, even ones I would have considered failures in the past. If I don’t succeed somewhere, I take what my weak point was and I don’t make that same mistake. That is an opportunity.

I am grateful that I have been given an amazing book that is helping me change my mindset that desperately needed changing. There is no getting discouraged or sitting in depression. There is no time, there is only time to move forward right now. I know I have potential, but I am also finally grasping the idea that I wont get what I want overnight or through any short-cuts. I have been applying to a ton of jobs that intimidate me because I know that discomfort and the unknown can hold great surprises and be some of the greatest learning opportunities. Though the idea of rejection sounds shitty, there really is nothing shitty about it unless we attach a meaning to it. I think as long as you are growing in areas that are important to you, you can only go up if you don’t give up. Not trying at all is a damn shame.

The difference here is I am learning when it is strategic to compromise and when it isn’t. Things can sound good, but if there is no room to move up, maybe it isn’t worth pursuing. Then again, it depends! Everyone’s life is different. For example, I need to have enough compensation to survive and save for my future and have benefits, or at least make enough money where I can afford benefits for myself. I feel super confident that I can make this happen. I will am willing to get a lot of nos, in order to find the ones that say yes, and want what I have to offer. Thank God I always have training in by back pocket.

The whole point of this post was to show that it is possible to change the way you view things. It takes time and practice, but if you stay persistent and committed to a new mindset, this can be done. Do what you need to do for yourself, take the advice that helps you and disregard the rest, but pay attention. There could be hidden gems in the things that offend you. Sorry if this post was kind of scattered all over the place. It kind of reflects part of my state of mind, but I am making sure to stick to my priorities.

Have a great weekend friends 🙂 Much love ❤


Your Dreams and Your Family


Hello all. I have been experiencing a lot lately in terms of uncertainty. I moved away from home to learn to grow up and stop relying so much on people. Also, I wanted to become who I was meant to be in my own space where I am not influenced by peoples’ previous perceptions of who I was. It is hard to grow when you are constantly around people who see you as static, when really we are changing every moment. These people may love you, but if you really want to become something, you must venture out eventually. It is sort of like a self-fulfilling prophecy… when you know someone sees you a certain way, you may continue to act in certain ways that you aren’t okay with anymore.

So, I have recently got the opportunity to move in with my grandparents, who also live in Florida, just an hour south of Melbourne. There were reasons that made it seem like a logical thing to do right now, even though I LOVE having my own space and privacy and quiet. I can do whatever I want here basically. It is a blessing, but it can also be bad. I was so conflicted today on the idea of leaving and moving in with MORE family. I sound ungrateful. I know I am blessed to have family that cares about my life and my well-being. However though, I had some fear that it would limit my growth.

 I am adopting a new perspective and seeing the opportunity in every situation. I am doing this thanks to a book I am reading, “The Obstacle Is The Way,” by Ryan Holiday. So in this situation, I get to spend more time with my grandparents and build an even better relationship with them. I also still don’t have to share a bathroom with anyone (I sometimes take long showers), and I know I will sleep well most of the time. I am also closer to a lot of areas in Florida that I love (I was always a south Florida fan). I get to explore a new area that I never got to see much of on my own as an adult because I was a kid when I visited the most often. Now I have transportation, and I have more control over how often I am there. I will get a better job and truly give my best efforts. I am trying to see all the positive and not dwell on the things I’m “losing.” It is what it is, and my judgments create my reality. So, I can make it shitty or great.

This will be a very temporary situation. I will be able to save money while still working toward my goals until another opportunity that is meant for me comes along. I have faith it will happen soon. I know my worth in the workplace when I am passionate.

It is funny how you can have a totally alien mindset compared to your family. I sometimes feel like I was just dropped here on Earth to be a weirdo and to do things people only think about. I have such an oddball mindset, but it is my truth and I wouldn’t trade it for anything else because than I wouldn’t be me. My family is very cut and dry about the way life is meant to be. I wouldn’t say my entire family, but definitely my grandparents and uncle. Our values are just in different places and that is ok. It just sucks being sensitive when people are trying to persuade you one way, but you really feel completely different. Making a living is all I hear. Money is all I hear. Sure, I would like more money, but my well-being and mental health come way before money. So does helping others help themselves. I don’t care if I never get monetarily rich in this life. I just want to spend the rest of my life working to help people experience more enjoyment in life, whether it be by training or floating or just listening.

I know must be realistic also. That is setting in. But basically, I was told to forget about what I cared about most because it wasn’t profitable. That made me feel a certain way. I just brushed it off, but it did rub me the wrong way. The past day or so I have just been questioning what family is. Like how did we end up with these people? They may care, but there is such a huge disconnect.

My parents are pretty awesome even though we still don’t see eye to eye on every little thing. They are open-minded to a certain degree, so I will take that. It wasn’t always this way. Things just get better when you have some distance from each other so you can appreciate each other more.

SO, my opportunity is to not get offended by the opinions of those around me. Instead, I can listen and see their perspective and choose to adjust mine if and when I see fit. I realize that for the time being, money is important. It may not be as big of a deal years down the road, but I do notice that I was a little too laid-back for a lot of my life until now. I always worked multiple jobs. I was not lazy, I was just not very strategic and my lack of confidence did hold me back. Yesterday I applied to jobs that intimidated me. Why? Because I want to learn and smash my obstacles. It is time. No more standing in my own way.

I am ready to smash my obstacles and succeed no matter what life throws my way. An event is an event until we attach meaning to it. This will take time and persistence and serious will, which I have. I don’t just give up and I never will. I can go through dark times, but I have tools in my arsenal to get out and not dwell. There is no time for that anymore. My life is going to keep getting better because I am committed to that.

I will let you know my progress on applying the principles of this book.

Have a good Tuesday friends 😊

Floating in Different States of Consciousness


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Hey guys! This post is going to talk about the different states of consciousness I have tried floating in. Before we get into the fun stuff, I want to state that I recommend floating without any substances, especially the first time. You want to get the full experience and see what it’s like, unaltered. We must learn to truly sit with ourselves. I never wanted to get into a habit where I felt like I had to get stoned or something before a float. This is probably a semi controversial topic among center owners and regular float clients.

I have gone through phases where I would smoke pot before, and times where I decided it would be more beneficial if I did not. I believe that you sort through more when you are sober. The different states I want to discuss include of course on NO substances, different time of day/night, lengthy floats, high from smoking pot, high from smoking a marijuana oil vape, after eating edible pot, micro dosing on psilocybin, and in a sleep deprived state.

This is just a fun post, it is nothing credible, just my experiences. I used to hold back a lot with what I posted on here because I worried about peoples’ opinions and how they might judge me, but let’s be real, plants are a lot more in the mainstream today. I’m not the only rebel out there =p .

I didn’t start trying new things in the tank for at least a few months after I started floating. I thought it was important to get a feel for it before I dabbled. I started floating in the afternoon, which was okay, but I would always hit rush hour traffic on the way home, which kind of took me out of that peaceful state. I started doing later nights, but I’m a weirdo, and I would stay up all night when I did this. Some people say then can fall right asleep after a night float, but not me and the way my brain is wired. I always wanted to bask in the feeling and not go right to sleep. The morning floats were my sweet spot. It was much easier for me to relax before the chaos of the day had my going 100 miles per hour. It is easier for me to wake up and go back to that sleep-like state. I felt that I got into deeper states during my 7AM floats. Everyone is different, so you just should find what works for you.

I must say, I really enjoy long floats. Most float centers offer 90 minute sessions as standard, but some offer 60 as well. The center I worked at only offered 60 minutes, which in my opinion, for my goals, was not enough time for me to get enough benefits. I think an hour float could be good for people floating purely for pain or relaxation or a quick nap. I think that a lot of people, including myself, have a difficult time shutting off. I feel like there are days where it takes me an hour to quiet my mind, and then the music would come on and the float was over before I got to get into a deep state. With 90 minutes it was rare that I had that same issue. One of the plus sides to working at a Float center was being able to control my own floats. I was able to set the timer for however long I wanted, which was awesome. The longest float I ended up doing was 4 hours. That was up in New York at The Float Place in Patchogue. It was an amazing float. It went a lot quicker that I would have expected. My longest float in Florida was close to 3 hours. It is so different when you are a guest at a center as opposed to working at one. When you work at one, you know you have to clean up after, so it isn’t as relaxing, but that comes with the territory. So, I was always tempted to get out early and start cleaning. But regardless, I am happy I challenged myself to the longer floats because it seriously challenged my ability to keep bringing myself back to present for a lengthy amount of time. 90 minutes can be a challenge, but double that is something else. I believe it is a good brain conditioning exercise to test your limits occasionally. It is usually when we least want to that we need it the most.

 To be honest, I didn’t really enjoy smoking regular flower before floating. You are in a tank or room for usually 90 minutes. Focusing on cotton mouth and the taste of weed in your mouth can take away from the float if you ask me. I enjoyed smoking my oil vape pen before a lot more. However, you just kind of drift off and aren’t as conscious of the insights you may be getting. I felt like I was in more of a sleep state than a conscious theta state, so I didn’t do that often. If my intention was just to kind of relax and chill, then I would hit the pen happily. There were only two times that I got the opportunity to eat an edible weed candy before floating, and that was during my trip home. THAT was something else. I broke the candy in half because it was strong and I had another float the following night. I was tired to begin with, but I swear this put me in another world. I went so deep, I woke up so disoriented. I couldn’t find the light. I had gotten water in my eyes, went to grab the towel and straight dropped it in the water. I threw it out of the room and sincerely apologized to my friends and offered to clean it. I also did not wake up until the very end of the music, which is unusual for me. (There are usually 5 minutes of music at the end of your float to cue you to wake up and slowly exit) The next day was the same situation, except I did not get salt in my eyes. So, it can be good and bad. I would say that edibles can be fun to throw into the mix occasionally, but maybe not all the time. I am curious though how it would have been on edibles had I not been sleep deprived.

The floats where I just did not sleep the night before for whatever reason were always great. If you pass out in the tank, you wake up feeling amazing. You may feel a bit disoriented for a few minutes, but then I always feel like I got a full nights’ sleep in an hour and a half. It truly is amazing. This is because we go into such a deep delta state.

Lastly, I would like to mention my experience taking a small dose of mushrooms before my float. It had to be 1.5 grams or so. I ate them and then set the music on for the beginning of the float as per i-sopod standard setting at the center I worked at. I set the float for 3 hours since it was a small dose. I also messed with the light settings for the first time during one of my floats. I knew it would take a few minutes to hit me, so I wanted to set a nice little vibe for myself. I had the light blue, then purple and then the alternating colors (I liked to call this one the disco ball). I could tell that I was feeling the effects from the psilocybin when I became more sensitive to the red light. I’m no color therapy expert, but I know red can provoke anxiety in already anxious people. I took this as an opportunity to surrender into what I was about to experience. I told myself it was okay and there was nothing to worry about. I was in just about the safest space possible, a float pod.

I wish I had a really exciting story to tell you about this experience, but unfortunately, I do not. I kept getting the message like “ok, why did you really need to do this?” I had expectations that I wasn’t completely aware of. I guess I was subconsciously hoping I would connect with other entities somewhere in another dimension, but all I did was lay there in a float tank. The most profound insight I received was that I didn’t need to try so hard to have any experience in life. If I was meant to come to know something, I would learn in some way, but it just didn’t have to be from taking psychedelics in a float tank.  I don’t regret it, and I am glad I was able to get that out of my system. I also want to mention that I managed to get lost in an I-sopod. That was a new one. I laughed at myself as I tried to find my way out.. Keep in mind this does not happen to normal people.

 I can’t say I’m not curious what a full dose would be like, but I don’t care to try any time soon to be honest. I am however, curious to hear about others’ experiences taking 3 or 4 grams in the tank. It was funny hearing Duncan Trussell speak this year at the Float Conference on taking psychedelics in the tank because what he described sounded almost exactly like mine. I will post that video below 😊 Keep in mind it is a long video because it is an episode of his podcast… I really tried to find the part I mentioned, but I could not. It’s worth a watch anyway!

SO, after all that, I still think people should NOT float on any substances for the most part. It is important to be alone with our selves. That is a big part of the point of floating. If you want to get a little stoned and just hang out in there, I wouldn’t discourage you. This is my point of view speaking as someone who just loves floating. I am by no means promoting “drug” use in float tanks. I wouldn’t even consider doing any of these things if you are just getting into floating. I just like to do experiments on myself. It is a liability though and if I were a center owner, I would have that in my disclaimer. So don’t do it guys =p , but if you do, you better tell me about it.

Have a great night friends! ❤



Cymatics and it’s Possible Potential in Float Therapy..?

cy3.jpgThis is an interesting topic to me. It was brought up to while I was working a shift with the original owner of Souler Float while the new owners were away. The dude was super cool. Before I begin, I am not going to pretend to be an expert on this topic as I am a still researching and learning about it myself. I encourage you to tell me if I am butchering it, but I am going to do my best to keep it simple. Cymatics seems to be hard to put into words because it is so complex to me, almost like Quantum Physics. Cymatics means “wave” in Greek, and it is defined as is a subset of modal vibrational phenomena. Cymatics has to do with frequency. There is a plate or surface that is vibrated in a specific way that causes particles to arrange themselves in particular ways. The plate itself and the intensity or rhythm of vibration determine the geometry that is produces by the sound waves. Cymatics basically makes sound visible, which is cool shit if you ask me!

Cymatics was originally used with a metal plate and sand. It can also be used in water apparently. Higher frequencies yield more complex geometric patterns. I am going to post a pretty sweet TED Talks about cymatics at the bottom of this post. I posted a few cool videos below as well showing what it is about.

It is no secret that our thoughts are vibrations. They resonate with specific frequencies. Sound healing has been becoming more of a thing (again, my knowledge is a bit limited in this area). Specific sound waves have been suggested to promote healing. I have experimented with bi-neurals, but never listened consistently enough to be able to say whether I experienced positive effects or not. I enjoy the sound of crystal bowls, but I haven’t been around them too much (tangent). I have been trying to stick to a balance between hippie things and science. Last year I was far more on the hippie side, now I’m more of a science person with wild curiosity and an open-mind. I am not knocking sound healing at all, I just don’t know a ton about it, which means I need to do more research.

I had a cool conversation with Alex. We both agreed that what we know about floating as a collective, is still just the tip of the iceberg. Research is being done and some awesome data has been revealed throughout the last float conferences. There is so much to consider still, and that is exciting. He believed there was a lot more to floating than what we do with it today. He suggested that maybe incorporating cymatics can possibly help certain types of float clients with different conditions. We couldn’t figure out how it would be incorporated, but it was still fun to discuss. If it sounded at all interesting to scientists, I trust them to figure out the best way to do this. I do wonder what the frequencies would do to the epsom salt if anything.. so many curiosities. I would totally have that dude on my future podcast.

As far as I am aware, there hasn’t been research done on this specific topic yet. However, I do think that if there was a way to incorporate Cymatics into Float Therapy, it could help alter brain waves in a way that is conducive to healing certain ailments and self-defeating thought patterns. I believe that his can have potential beneficial effects on those who suffer from anxiety/PTSD and depression.

I wanted to post this to just get the idea out there most of all. As I mentioned, I am not super knowledgeable yet in this topic, but you can be sure I will be researching my butt off to learn more about this. I may also shoot it over to some professionals to see what they think. It may be bananas, or it may change the future of Float Therapy forever. You never know until you put it out there.

I will post more as I learn. Thanks friends.

I would love to hear peoples’ feedback on this topic that either are familiar with floating or sound healing or psychology or all of those =p




Ego and “betrayal”


Hey friends. This is a topic that I don’t even want to talk about, but it is relevant in my life now, and I’m sure you have experienced similar situations. I believe in Karma and I do think you get what you put out. I don’t want to go into too much detail or start ripping another person apart because I conceptually understand that none of us are perfect as humans.

I have done things that I never thought I would do, and I have often learned from those things and stopped behaving in that way. We all go through tough, confusing times in life. This can alter our behavior. I know because when I was younger (in my teens and early twenties), I didn’t think of the consequences of my actions. I didn’t think my actions would affect anyone but me. I was living in quite the delusion then.

I betrayed a few people very close to me that I loved dearly and I tortured myself for it for years. I medicated, I wanted to die because of the guilt. Time heals things, even though it doesn’t seem that way sometimes. It may take a long time. I had an experience while I was visiting home where I had a traumatizing situation occur with one of my oldest friends. I found out she had betrayed my trust in a way that seems impossible to forgive. I am nowhere near ready and I don’t know if I will ever be in this case. When a “friend” knows of your suffering and still acts in a way that would truly damage you further, they are no friend at all. Though I know this is my ego that feels so hurt, I am still not interested in offering this person any ounce of compassion or empathy. This is not like me, but I must be honest about where I am at. I felt that deading this person completely was the best thing to do because of her instability and lack of thought for others. It was a friendship that was expiring anyway for some time. I didn’t enjoy being around her for a while and maybe I intuitively knew she wasn’t an honest person.  She was also just not a positive influence on me. I want to point out though, that no matter how angry and resentful I felt, I never wished real harm on this person. Even if I say I dislike a person, I still want the best for them in life because we all deserve to live happy lives. I would still get excited over good news for them. I’m not a dick like a lot of other people.

Even though I still decided to end the friendship with the girl involved, I didn’t feel the need to go on and put the girl down. I simply stated how I felt. This situation helped me raise my standards a lot higher for the people I allow into my life. When I care I care, and some people just don’t deserve that part of you. Everyone deserves love, but not everyone deserves YOUR love. You deserve that the most, and I am learning that now.

I have my issues in relationships and I will admit that. I have only been in two real romantic relationships in my whole life up until now. (I’m 25), and that has been with the same person, years apart. As humans, relationships give us a lot of things. They give us good feelings (hopefully), they give us comfort, a sense of purpose and a way to express ourselves and grow with another person. Ego is what makes people get lost in relationships. Ego is also why we feel so lost when a relationship ends or shifts in a way that throws us off. Anything that gives us the illusion of form or consistent comfort is probably an act of ego. I think the biggest cure for this is communication on both ends.

So how do we go forward and not become bitter, resentful people when we get hurt? I don’t 100% know this answer. I just think that being honest about our feelings and communicating with whoever is involved is necessary. I think not talking about it excessively also helps. You want to process and let it go, not dig it up over and over. The tone in which you communicate is very important. You don’t want to speak purely from emotion. Giving yourself some time to process helps as well along with doing your very best to look at the big picture. I think it is important to think about what a relationship means to you (romantic relationship or friendship). If you have experienced an abundant amount of joy and meaningful connection in a relationship that you KNOW was real, it could be worth salvaging. If you really haven’t, and time was the only thing you shared with someone, maybe it isn’t worth salvaging. That is on us to decide. There is no right or wrong answer here. I think it helps us to see the lessons in situations. It is usually the most painful situations in life that bring us to the most beautiful places. That sounds cliché, but it is the truth. We may not comprehend this in the moment, but in time, things make more sense. I think my lesson in this was to really, truly be able to put myself in a person’s shoes and remain aware of my ego’s role. Also, this situation showed me what I truly want in life more-so relationship-wise. It showed me how much I cared and still care about the person I felt intense love for aside from family for the first time. Whatever comes of that, I will speak my truth and leave the rest up to the universe.

You can make something into a whole drama if you want to. That shit is easy. I could have considered how long I had known the girl and made it into more of a big deal, but at this point in my life, I have a very clear vision for my future, and I don’t want to look back anymore. It is empowering as fuck to only look forward and be concerned with executing your vision for your life.

I guess the point of this post was to encourage you to think before you react when you are hurt. There is nothing wrong with telling someone you need time to process before you get back to them on what will happen going forward. That way, if you change your mind, you won’t look like an asshole. If you don’t change your mind, that is alright too, but at least you will have confirmation that you made the right choice. Also, sleeping on things can help tremendously, but not always. I encourage all of you to do right by yourselves and not own the feelings of others. Too many people do that, and hold back because of it. Let’s stop that together as much as we can.

No dwelling, just floating along ❤