Lessons Learned from Living on my Own

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Hello! This post sounds lame already, but it was just fun to come up with. I intend on my later posts being a lot more informative, so don’t give up now. I know people have made crazier, more intense moves, and that mine is not that special, but to me it is. So, here we go:

~Your strengths are magnified as well as your human defects; As far as strengths, you may surprise yourself with your work ethic or with how much you are able to carry out without the necessary need for validation or recognition. As for your defects, When you have no one, or feel like you have no one in your corner (Depression), you feel things more intensely, and it can cause chaos if you don’t stay on top of your mood and do everything that you can to keep yourself mentally and physically healthy.

~You have less people to complain to; As a result, you get more shit done without going through as much talk in your head. This means less procrastination and feeling sorry for yourself, as well as more productivity.

~Trust your intuition on who you choose as your friends; You may feel alone and desperate at times, so you may let people in that you normally would not, just because there are limited people you come into contact with because of work etc… These people can be low-vibe people who are going nowhere fast, or just not people you want to surround yourself with. This may mean putting yourself more out there and also learning to enjoy your own company more (OH NO! =p)

~You don’t have to be friends with your co-workers if you plan on moving up; You may disagree with this one, but it depends on a few things. If you are really good at separating work stuff from friendships, go ahead. Also, be careful how much you tell your co-workers about yourself or your life. Keeping a healthy distance is good as long as you can still work well together. You don’t get a job for all the lovely friends you will make, you are there for a common vision to carry out, nothing more.

~If I don’t stay active and move my body, I get depressed real quick; I had a difficult time adjusting for the first few months after moving. I felt like I had no time, and the time I had off, I had endless things to do. I felt like I had no time or energy for working out since my anxiety was draining it. Now, I rediscovered kickboxing and running, with some weight training mixed in there when I can. This is soo important in my mood. Sadly, a medication did need to come back into play for a bit, but I am optimistic that I can start to decrease my dose already.

~Never voluntarily put yourself in a dangerous situation as a means of “survival”; Just don’t. Work with integrity or find something else. Sure, be creative and entrepreneurial as long as it is on your terms.

~Do what you have to do to keep yourself happy, and don’t dwell and judge yourself for your mistakes. Learn from them and let them go; Forward is the only way to go. This is a big one for me. I used to constantly look back, but I am learning not to, and it is empowering and amazing for creativity.

~You can’t always eat organic and super healthy when you have rent and bills to pay; It sucks, but its true for me. You have to compromise and find a balance. I went from being super neurotic about everything I ate and did, and when I moved, I lost all of that discipline for a while. My diet was shit, and I felt it.

~I don’t like to cook in someone else’s kitchen; Personal preference haha. Maybe it’s just an excuse not to really cook. I feel like such a hypocrite when I am not prepping my food EVER. I am going to do better when I get home.

~You don’t always get what you want!; Life will unfold in it’s own way. There is really very little we have control over, aside from our daily actions. I moved somewhere, took a risk, and technically, I guess I failed. I left the job I was at, which was the main reason for me moving out of New York. However, I don’t like to see everything as a failure, so long as you learn from them. I think it is healthy to admit when we fuck up and admit our shortcomings for sure, but as long as we keep going forward and taking action in the direction we would like to be in, then screw it!

~Loneliness can light a fire under your ass and get you focused quick!; Loneliness is a feeling. This I know. It is not reality. It never will be. However, from time to time I just FEEL alone. I feel all alone, like I’m lost and have no friends or family that cares about me. I feel like I will die and no one will find me (anxiety). I feel sorry for myself for a few minutes, then move the fuck on because I realize I am abundant as hell, and that thought is total B.S. I do not have many friends in Melbourne. A few moved away in the short time of me being there. I use my down time to work on my goals now. I make sure that I get things done every day that will make me more valuable and more of an asset in whatever I decide to do. I actually appreciate the feeling of loneliness sometimes now, because it makes me reach out to someone I know loves the shit out of me. I am also super productive. You don’t SIT in feelings as long when no one is there to validate them. Then they tend to dissipate. I feel that I have more of a choice in my mood, not that it’s perfect (its not!).

SO, those were just a few things that I have come to learn through my experience. Everyone is different, so everyone has their own lessons to learn. What I take away from most of this, to sum it up; make sure you are taking care of yourself and being true to yourself. Don’t let people take advantage of you and speak up for yourself. There is always a way out of depression even when it doesn’t seem like it. Thoughts change like the weather, so take it a day at a time. Life carries with it uncertainties, and we must be sure to take care of ourselves in all aspects, no matter what. If we feel like shit all the time, we will not be motivated, and our life will be just OK, if not unbearable. Life should be fun and exciting, most of the time. There are opportunities in a lot of places, we may just have to move around to find the best ones 🙂 . I am learning about detachment and letting go. I am doing my best not to get too comfortable anywhere, because things can change in an instant, and I want to be prepared as I can be. Life isn’t about comfort. It is about creating and living, and having no “what-ifs,”.

Thanks for reading friends<3

 

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